Most Awesome Wedding Announcement Ever!

Dr. Stan Prusinger, winner of the 1997 Nobel Prize, looking extremely happy at not being married any longer to Rick Turk's sister, Sandy.


Okay, so Eric stumbled across this while reading the Sunday paper, and I just have to post it, because it's possibly the greatest wedding announcement ever!

"Turk-Takeuchi Wedding

Rich Turk (55 years old) and Katie Takeuchi (47 years old) were married March 31, 2005 just days after her lengthy divorce was finalized. Her young daughter was the maid of honor. They got engaged on the top of the Eiffel Tower in March 2004, after a 7 week courtship. They are both glad to have found the love of their lives.

They are semi-retired in Marin, enjoying travels to Paris, Rome, London, Cannes and Cabo San Lucas. Favorites include honeymoon suites at Maui's Four Seasons, Vegas' Bellagio, Tahoe ski trips and even spring training.

The groom has a BA in Genetics from UC Berkeley, and the bride has a BS in Psychobiology from UCA. While pursuing her pre-med studies, Katie modeled part-time, appearing in Sports Illustrated, among others. Katie also attended a doctorate program at UC Berkeley. Rick sister, Sandy (Cal grad), was married to Dr. Stan Prusiner, a 1997 Nobel Prize Laureate. Rick and Katie's marriage is a merger of many UC grads. Katie's ex graduated from the Universidad de San Andres in the 1970's. Rick's ex dropped out of Polytechnic High School in the 1950's. Katie volunteers for a literacy program and for the Friends of the Elderly."

So is this a couple with an axe to grind or what? It's hard to know where to start with this one, but consider the following clues:

"just days after her lengthy divorce": Tells you two things-these two are impetuous, and also she had a tough time dumping her ex.

"Her young daughter was the maid of honor": Presumably since the daughter is referenced as "hers", then how young is this daughter? If her divorce was so lengthy, why was she having kids with her ex, who "graduated from the Unversidad de San Andres in the 1970's?" Katie and her ex were clearly not spring chickens, so...I'm just wondering. I think a pattern regarding Katie's thought processes is emerging.

(also, a quick google on the Universidad de San Andres" tells us this about Katie's ex: he was fluent or near fluent in Spanish, and in order to attend this small university in Buenos Aires, he had to at least have a 2.7 GPA. Remember this when we get to RICK'S ex later)

"They got engaged on the top of the Eiffel Tower in May 2004, after a 7-week courtship.": Further evidence of the couple's impetuous nature.

"They are semi-retired in Marin, enjoying travels to Paris, Rome, London, Cannes and Cabo San Lucas.": well, la-di-fuckin' da, aren't they special?

"Favorites include honeymoon suites at Maui's Four Seasons, Vegas' Bellagio, Tahoe ski trips, and even spring training." : does this mean favorite honeymoon suites? If so, how long a honeymoon did they take? Also, if it does mean favorite honeymoon suites, then I think this is just too much information.

"The groom has a BA in Genetics from UC Berkley and the bride has a BS in Psychobiology from UCLA. While pursuing her pre-med studies, Katie modeled part-time, appearing in Sports Illustrated, among others.": So I find this part fascinating. The non-sequitor about Katie's modeling career reveals a certain self-centeredness, don't you think? Also, apparently, Katie used to be something of a hottie.

"Katie also attended a doctorate program at UC Berkeley." Although it seems she never graduated? This merits a mention, however poor Rick is now forgotten because the next sentence reveals the following: "Rick's sister Sandy (Cal grad), was married to Dr. Stan Prusiner, a 1997 Nobel Prize Laureate." Go Sandy!

Futher bragging about the glory of UC education commences, then we get to this little nugget, which I believe may be the point of the entire announcement "Rick's ex dropped out of Polytechnic High School in the 1950's."

Wow. In your face, Rick's ex! You loser! Now Katie's got him AND his sister Sandy's oh-so-smart husband! Or possibly not, since Sandy "WAS married to the Dr. Stan Prusiner". No mention of whether the venerable Dr. Prusiner is still alive or not, so I'm assuming another "lengthy divorce".

Anyway, discuss amongst yourselves the wonder that is this marriage announcement. And thank your lucky stars for your own little disfunctional relationship, which cannot possibly be as messed up as Rick and Katie's promises to be!